Where Do You Seek Self-Worth?

Merriam Webster Dictionary defines self-worth as: a sense of one’s own value as a human being. Here are a few of the synonyms from the Thesaurus: self-assurance; self-confidence; self-esteem; and self-trust.

Do you see? Each of these compound words begins with ‘self.’

Self, in my case, means me, who I am or consider myself to be. I am the person I’m with 24/7, so it’s imperative for me to know and accept myself with all my virtues, all my shortcomings, my inside as well as my outside. We cannot help how other people feel about us. We can only control how we feel about ourselves. But how can we find our own self-worth if we don’t take the time and do the work to know ourselves on the deepest level.

There is danger in having low self-worth based on seeking it from outside ourselves. I care about myself all the time, not to the exclusion of anyone else. I love me as much as I love my parents, children, family, and friends. We are equally important because all of us are here on purpose. There is a reason each of us came to be on this earth at this particular time, and that is because we each serve a purpose. But how can I know my purpose if I spend all my time and energy on trying to be who the person of the moment wants me to be?

I can’t. I live in fear, in insecurity, in jealousy, in trying to please everyone but myself.  Each moment I live in this state of chaos, I live in dissatisfaction. I cannot love fully, because I cannot believe that I am worthy of the love of others. Each moment I accept this state of being, I lose more of my authentic self whom I never took the time to know.

I live in discontent, sadness, and pain, and I keep it all buried way down deep.

Out in the world, I dress neat although plain. I do my job well. I can converse with my co-workers, but since I do not trust myself, I cannot trust anyone, and so I do not make real connections with anyone outside of my family. I accept less because I do not believe that I deserve better.

Meanwhile, these toxic emotions are building up and overflowing, poisoning every corner of my soul. When the next disappointment or heartache comes, as it will, because your energy is dark, not allowing even a pinpoint of light to pierce it, you become steeped in your bitterness, hating yourself and hating those who could not love you the way you loved them.

Is it really worth it to place such an important aspect of yourself in the hands of another, and lose your hope, your joy, your soul?

NO!!!!!

I am here at this place and time because I’m on a journey to the light. I love me, but not to the exclusion of anyone else. I want to know my purpose because, in my purpose, I find joy, satisfaction, success.  In my purpose, I live life to the full, continually growing and evolving, open to the goodness of life. In my purpose, I find peace in the midst of the storm, even in the midst of my tears. My self-worth isn’t based on what happens to me in life. My self-worth is knowing I am loved by my Creator, my God, who made me just as I am, and loves me unconditionally. He is bigger than anything in this world because He created this world. He made me imperfect but fit for the purpose for which He made me. I am worthy because I am His.

Self-worth, to me, is knowing at my deepest core, that I am here to fulfill a purpose that only I can fill. Therein is my value. Therein is my worth. Have you checked your self-worth lately?